I Think I Have To Fight My Neighbor

I got new neighbors about two years ago. They weren't bad for the most part. Drank a little late in the summertime with the music bumping, but that didn't bother me. Even considered joining them, but they kept to themselves for the most part so I let them be. They were cool enough. Enter my neighbor's 35 year old step son. 

This guy is the epitome of a douche, he just moved in a few months back. He revs his shitty corvette and flies around the cul-de-sac with kids playing in the street. He washes his car shirtless like three times a week. Everyone hates him. As much as he loves his car, his absolute favorite thing in the whole entire world is fireworks. As an adult, I hate fireworks. It drives my dogs crazy. 

My Pit Bull can take it, but every time someone starts lighting off I think my 12 year old Lab is going to die. He pants himself into this doggy panic attack thing to the point where he can barely breath. If this guy kills my dog... I'm not even going to finish the sentence. 

I've had other neighbors set off fireworks. Fourth of July, Memorial Day, occasional graduation party, whatever. I've never complained, never called the cops. But this jackass has no rhyme or reason to setting off fireworks. I mean, he did them tonight on a random Wednesday in June. I can see into his backyard, they aren't even having a party. I think he's setting them off by himself. This guy might just be looking for confrontation, I'm more than willing to deliver. 

My first attempt at deescalation is going to try and explain things to him. Tell this ManChild that other neighbors have expressed their displeasure at his random illegal fireworks. Oh yes sir, they are illegal, no aerial fireworks are permitted in the state of New Jersey. In fact, there was just a big fire yesterday one town over from an illegal firework. I'll even appeal to him as a dog owner and explain the situation with my pups. If he does not heed my warning, game on. 

My second attempt will not be pleasant. If he sees me coming again, he'll be ready. Probably take his phone out and try to make me go viral for being the guy who complains about fireworks. I'm not going to let that happen. I'm just going to run in and fight him. No explanation, he knows what he did. He has nothing to fight for, he just moved back in with his parents. I'm fighting for my dog's life, I won't lose. I hope it doesn't come to this. But bonus points if I bounce his head off the corvette.