Weird, this is my second homeless people blog in the last month. My last one was suggesting them as contestants on Survivor. I think all this "we need to save the world" talk is turning me into a philanthropist. I want to save the homeless.
So why not become priests? I saw this Catholic priest today walk out of his paid for house and I thought, hey not a bad gig. His house is bigger than mine is. He was in a tracksuit. I'm not sure what the rules on the whole collar get-up are but he just looked like a regular dude. The priest then got into his Jeep Wrangler (2 door of course, because of the whole vow of poverty thing) and went to go get groceries. I know he got groceries because I was still there when he got home to carry them in and wondered who pays for priest's groceries. I was hanging out in the front yard of a friend's house across the street. I don't have some Ray Donovan vendetta where I stalk priests, I swear.
Free house, free Jeep, free groceries. I couldn't be a priest because of the whole celibacy bit. I'm aware of the irony. Good one. Anyway, I wouldn't want the gig, but I started to wonder who would. Homeless people! It's a win win really, and honestly the Christian thing to do. It's no secret that the Catholic Church is struggling to convince young men to become priests nowadays. Well, do I have a crop a candidates for you.
Besides the obvious perks of room and board, the job description really isn't all that demanding. All you have to do is be able to read. You even get to drink on the job. It's mandatory actually. The best part is, homeless people are already experts in talking and listening to people that don't actually exist.
Ok, so that's the end of the blog. I am Irish Catholic though, so I am freaking out at what I just wrote. I am going to hell, no doubt about it. Sorry God. It was just a joke. So.Much.Catholic.Guilt. Jesus Christ, how am I going to explain this one in Confession. I might just have to create my own Penance for my sins this go around and hope The Big Man calls it even stevens.
So why not become priests? I saw this Catholic priest today walk out of his paid for house and I thought, hey not a bad gig. His house is bigger than mine is. He was in a tracksuit. I'm not sure what the rules on the whole collar get-up are but he just looked like a regular dude. The priest then got into his Jeep Wrangler (2 door of course, because of the whole vow of poverty thing) and went to go get groceries. I know he got groceries because I was still there when he got home to carry them in and wondered who pays for priest's groceries. I was hanging out in the front yard of a friend's house across the street. I don't have some Ray Donovan vendetta where I stalk priests, I swear.
Free house, free Jeep, free groceries. I couldn't be a priest because of the whole celibacy bit. I'm aware of the irony. Good one. Anyway, I wouldn't want the gig, but I started to wonder who would. Homeless people! It's a win win really, and honestly the Christian thing to do. It's no secret that the Catholic Church is struggling to convince young men to become priests nowadays. Well, do I have a crop a candidates for you.
Besides the obvious perks of room and board, the job description really isn't all that demanding. All you have to do is be able to read. You even get to drink on the job. It's mandatory actually. The best part is, homeless people are already experts in talking and listening to people that don't actually exist.
Ok, so that's the end of the blog. I am Irish Catholic though, so I am freaking out at what I just wrote. I am going to hell, no doubt about it. Sorry God. It was just a joke. So.Much.Catholic.Guilt. Jesus Christ, how am I going to explain this one in Confession. I might just have to create my own Penance for my sins this go around and hope The Big Man calls it even stevens.
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