Haters. The whole lot of you. This country has a serious jealousy problem. I’m not sure where it originated with Jackson Mahomes. Maybe it’s because his sick dance moves, or because his brother is Pat Mahomes, or because he’s nice at basketball, but it’s out of control. I’ve never seen anyone so universally hated on the internet for virtually no reason.
It’s hard to imagine someone who doesn’t know Jackson for how far his influence reaches. But if I had to explain him to someone who’s never heard of him I’d say he’s a great dancer who likes to cheer on his brother at football games. Oh, and he’s 21 years old and America wants to drive his lifeless body through the the streets like he’s Mussolini.
Twen-ty-one-years-old. Meanwhile every single move he makes warrants a full investigation from the fun police. Like everyone applauding that fraud ass Kansas City bar who put Jackson on blast over Instagram. Oh I’m sorry, a 21 year-old is a dick at a bar? That’s national news now? Because I’m so sure all of you were just model fucking citizens your first year of legally drinking. I’ll tell you what, that KC bar lost a customer for life in me.
I’m not saying Jackson’s perfect. He’s close, but he’s not without fault. Sean Taylor was a hero in every sense of the word and Jackson recklessly disgraced his memory by dancing on his memorial. Jackson acknowledged his mistake, publicly apologized, and plead that he was unaware of the memorial. Not only was he unaware, he claims he was told to go into the roped off area. But the WFT wouldn’t possibly set Jackson up to get the heat off their own skeletons in the closet, would they? Plus to be fair, if you didn’t look down it could have been easily mistaken for a roped off dancing area.
Don’t believe me? Here’s Jackson’s almost identical roped off area in Arrowhead. Only difference is Chiefs’ chains are yellow and WFT’s are white:
These two incidents have contributed to Jackson being constantly harassed. Whether on his viral Renegade videos, from his suite, or being called “Mahomo” on the sidelines before the Bronco game. What’s wrong with people? Jackson’s just quirky and he’s explained multiple times that he identifies as straight. Even if he wasn’t, so what? Slurs from the stands is fucked up either way you slice it. Not that it matters if he was, but Jackson’s really not gay. Here’s a picture of him tonguing a ten. Find a new slant.
For the amount of hate, criticism, and abuse Jackson takes online and in real life, he might be the most patient person of all time. Alright so one time he spilled a little water on a Ravens fan who spent the entire game heckling him. Oh no! Not water! How will that man ever recover?! One slip up, that was it. Every other thing hurled at Jackson is met with silent and peaceful resolve. No matter how cruel or unrelenting.
Luckily, he has his best friend and sister in law Brittany to stand up for him when people are being dicks. Oh, but we hate her for some reason too. Because….why again? She yells when her Super Bowl winning husband scores a touchdown? Or because she dances with Jackson? I’m starting to think the media couldn’t find anything wrong with Mahomes so it turned everyone against his family and all you little rodents took the cheese.
Oooooh right I remember. We want her thrown in jail because she sprayed champagne on fans after her husband won probably the best playoff game of all time. Because we would never stand for that, right?
Right?
Right?
(Alright this website sucks and my pictures are hit or miss so if it doesn’t load, it’s a lot less dramatic, but it’s Kyle Lowry spraying fans after the NBA title and some hockey player doing the same after presumably the Stanley Cup. I’m not entirely sure, I don’t care about hockey. But don’t take my word for it, Google’s a helluva drug.)
Despite the incessant attacks on Jackson and his family, he takes it all in stride. Admirable to say the least. If people tried to ruin my reputation on a weekly basis I’d be out for blood. But not our king. No, how does Jackson respond? Dances right in your fucking face. Deal with it.
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