Tuesday, February 15, 2022

My Rams Curse Has Finally Been Lifted


I’m happy for Aaron Donald for solidifying his proper place in NFL history. I’m happy for Cooper Kupp having arguably the best wide receiver season ever. I’m happy for McVay silencing all the doubters. I’m happy for Stafford clawing his way out of hell to challenge the minds of Hall of Fame voters in just one year. I’m happy for OBJ for proving all the haters wrong. I’m happy for my guys. But enough about them. 

I’ve been fighting for a Rams championship for longer than any player on that team. 

During the 2001 season, the Rams’ Greatest Show On Turf seemed to be reaching it’s pinnacle. Kurt Warner, Marshall Faulk, Torry Holt, Isaac Bruce, Orlando Pace, the whole sha-bang. Rams were on a crash course with an improbable young up and comer, Tom Brady and the Patriots. 

My third grade teacher (curse you Mrs. Leite) decided to ask the class who they want to win the Super Bowl by a show of hands. I don’t know if these kids knew their football or if it was just because she said Patriots first, but every single person raised their hand for the Patriots. So I raised my hand for the Rams. Quite the contrarian even at such a young age. 

Mrs. Leite tells me to explain why I want the Rams to win. I didn’t know there’d be a test? I had nothing. “Just to be a dick,” wasn’t an acceptable answer. So chest out, I proudly told the class, “Because I’m a Rams fan.” You would’ve thought I voted for the Nazis to win. The whole class jumped down my throat. Everyone was quick to point out the Giants jacket I constantly wore to school. I told them my Dad made me wear it. I was the harshest critic in the class and my classmates saw their chance and took it. 

They called me a liar, they called me a band wagon fan, and worst of all, they called me a front-runner. “I’m NOT a front-runner!” I had no idea what a front-runner was but I was sure I wasn’t one. I’ll show these fucking idiots, I’ll show them all. I’m Rams til’ I die now, I have no choice. Plus my new found team is in the Super Bowl? How hard will it possibly be to be a fan of a team this good? 

The Rams lost that Super Bowl. Tom Brady actually played like shit. Ty Law and Adam Vinatieri won that first ring. Whatever, we have Kurt Warner and Marshall Faulk we’ll be back next year. We were not back next year. Rams went 7-9 my first full year of fandom. 

The football gods do not smile favorably on turncoats. I didn’t know it at the time but I was about to serve a twenty year sentence. 

It was my fault they were so bad for so long. I was silently cursing the Rams and nobody knew it but me.

I stuck with them. I was confident Marc Bulger was the rightful heir. I was in love with Steven Jackson. I was cocky about Sam Bradford not knowing his knees were made of glass. I thought Robert Quinn was the next LT. I fought for Jeff Fisher and Jared Goff. I talked shit during our twelve year playoff drought. 

I live in New Jersey. I don’t know if you’ve ever met a a Jets or Giants fan from New Jersey but they’re scum of the earth. The Rams left me in the trenches taking grenades from overweight drunks with too-tight backwards hats and kids with too much gel in their hair. Giants had two Super Bowl wins and Jets had their back-to-back AFC Championship games years in that time frame. Two of the easiest franchises to talk shit to and I didn’t have a leg to stand on against them because at the end of the day I was a Rams fan.

And then Aaron Donald was drafted and then McVay came, and things were starting to change. From worst to first in our first year under McVay. Second year Super Bowl. Shit the bed, took a couple shots personally, but I felt it in my loins that we’d be back. 

I heard the noise all season. We couldn’t beat good teams. We thought our Week 3 win over the Bucs was the Super Bowl. I even got into an argument with a Zach Wilson wiener rider in a Mcloone’s that we should fire McVay. We’re gonna get washed by the Cardinals first round of the playoffs. Wrong. Made Kyler quit. There’s no way we beat the Bucs twice. Wrong. Bengals are a “Team of Destiny.” Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong…

It was poetic really. I’m not sure the date I became a Rams fan but it’s damn close to exactly twenty years. The Rams brought Tom Brady into this world, it was only right that we take him out. But just like 2002, new up and comer stud who everyone was rooting for. The team that’s lost for so many years now has their young stud. Same place I found myself in my first Rams Super Bowl. But this time we were ready and we wiped our ass with the Nation’s dreams. Only Detroit, 1/3 of LA, 1/2 of St. Louis, and myself were rooting for the Rams. Super Bowls Champions. 

It doesn’t matter that McVay might leave for TV even though he’s never had a first round draft pick. It doesn’t matter that Aaron Donald might ride off into the sunset. It doesn’t matter that Whitworth might join him. It doesn’t matter that Von Miller and OBJ are free agents. It doesn’t matter how old Stafford is getting. Doesn’t matter that my kindergarten niece will get her driver’s license before the Rams see another first round pick. 

None of it matters because we pulled it off. Hangovers last two days now but Lombardi’s shine forever. 


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