There aren’t many companies left that can claim that they run their business off good, clean morales. In fact, I reckon there was only two left. I’m sure you know which two I’m going to say. Yup, Costco Snack Stand and Steak-umms. Steak-umms obviously for their Twitter approach. Costco, obviously for their founder Jim Sengal telling the current CEO that, “If you raise the price of the fucking hot dog, I will kill you. Figure it out.” Hot dog and soda combo still $1.50, same it’s been since 1985. But a newcomer approaches, Garigari-kun.
This Japanese ice cream company recently made an apology video for raising their price from Y60 to Y70. That’s a nine cent raise. I’ve watched this video an embarrassing amount of times. Before each viewing I didn’t know whether I was going to laugh or cry this time.
Japan does not play by the same rules. They felt this shit in their fucking souls. The damn founder, or president, or whoever that sad old man was holding his thumb before the camera panned out, made the entire company come out to face the music. Over nine cents.
I half expected the entire company to perform a seppuku right then and there. You might have seen seppukus in movies or TV. They’re the samurai suicides where the person stabs themself in the stomach and then someone immediately chops there head off with a sword. Thank God they didn’t. Because I forgive them. I forgive them so much.
No notes app for Garigari-kun. Instead they made maybe my favorite apology video ever. The whole thing was perfect, the music, the sad faces, topped off with the elegance of the bow. Who could stay mad?
Alright to be honest I just realized this video is five years old. It doesn’t undo everything I just said but it certainly feels different now. Have you ever gotten an apology for something five years later? It’s like, yeah dude whatever, I don’t care about that anymore. But my power rankings have been updated and there’s no turning back: 1. Costco Sanck Stand, 2. Garigari-kun, 3. Steak-umms.
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