Canceling people isn’t real, we all know that deep down. The media declares “canceled” like Michael Scott declares bankruptcy. Doesn’t make it true. The evident proof is the difference in people who have committed the same “atrocities” that have received vastly different treatment.
Example 1:
Do you know of a celebrity that stood up for their spouse on a very public platform? Somebody made a joke about their betrothed and they quickly ran to the defense to protect them from the masses? Yeah me too. Kristin Cavallari.
Kristin’s Instagram post of her then husband, Jay Cutler painted him in a not so flattering light. All the insta-comedians came out posting comments like, “WTF did he eat himself?” Unable to take the onslaught of jokes being hurled at her husband, Cavallari’s justice was swift. She posted another picture of Cutler with the caption, “Since Jay looked like a 300-pound lesbian in my last post, I felt I should do him justice by posting him looking hot AF in this one.” Despite her dragging the LGBTQ community into this for seemingly no reason, Cavallari was praised for her defense of her helpless husband.
Fast forward to this year’s Oscar’s ceremony. Oh yes. Jada Pickett Smith, wife of our Fresh Prince, Will Smith, also found herself on the wrong end of a half-assed written joke. Given the praise in the past that people have received for defending their spouses, surely Will thought he had a green light. Just a little slap? Just a little one. What happened? Public hysteria and a ban from The Academy. With I Am Legend 2 right around the corner no less. What are we supposed to do? All pretend like he shouldn’t receive an Oscar nom for his reprisal of Dr. Robert Neville? Fat chance.
Example 2:
Were you watching that time when millions of families tuned in to watch their beloved sport only to have an athlete wipe his ass with sportsmanship and give the viewers the middle finger? The athlete claims it was in response to years of targeted ridicule from the outspoken and often rough fan base. I’m talking of course, of Eli Manning.
During ESPN’s Manningcast of Eagles vs Cowboys, Eli and Peyton Manning had Chris Long on to talk about the reputation of Philadelphia’s fanbase. Eli promptly gave the entire country the “double bird” on national television. Mind you, unprovoked. You think there were no more Manningcasts following that? Of course not. We chalked it up to a funny meme for a week or two and carried on with our lives.
But now the same ESPN who broadcast Eli’s vulgar display of fingers, wants Kyrie Irving’s head on a platter for the same action. Unlike Eli, Kyrie was being called a pussy by the Celtic fanbase while casually dropping 39 in a heated playoff game. Why the different treatment? What is the obviously glaring difference between Kyrie and Eli hmmm? HMMMM?! Correct, Kyrie was outspoken about being vaccinated.
Example 3:
Do you know any Russians with a little penis who’s taken the world by storm due to their thirst for violence? Every time you turn on a screen there they are, while everyone’s discussing their latest attack. Right, Hasbullah.
Hasbullah has stolen the hearts of the American people with vicious haymakers and high pitched exclamations. The other side of that coin of course, Vladimir Putin, not so much. Just going to go ahead and say good cancel. Nailed this one. I fully endorse cancelling Vladimir Putin. But you see what I’m getting at here.
Example 4:
A not so funny lesbian comedian has found her way into making headlines for ridiculing and yelling at people who’s names she doesn’t even know. Uh huh, you’ve guessed it, Hannah Gadsby.
Despite never meeting me, I was scolded by Hannah Gadsby in her Netflix special “Nanette”. Which The NY Times described as “Comedy-Destroying, Soul-Affirming, Art.” For her tongue-lashing, I mean in Nanette, Hannah Gadsby won an Emmy, a Peabody Award, a GLAAD Media Award, and an AACTA for Best Comedy Performer.
But God forbid Ellen Degeneres yells at the people who work for her. Oh I’m sorry, have you never been yelled at by your boss before? Impractical Jokers-esque games with Adele in a Jamba Juice, word association with Justin Bieber, giving Kristen Bell a sloth to the point of tears? Did that mean nothing to you people? hope you’re happy, no more Taylor Swift jump scares.
Example 5:
How about a couple of dicksy chicks who made it into the limelight for their criticism of a wrinkly old white man who forced himself into occupying territory that he had no business being in? That’s right, former Playboy Bunny of The Girl’s Next Door hit reality television show, Holly Madison.
Holly since leaving The Girls Next Door has been outspoken about the dark side of being Hugh Hefner’s girlfriend. During her A&E docuseries, Madison detailed the hellish conditions that came with the price of being a resident of the Playboy Mansion. She even went on to describe her love for Hefner as a Stockholm Syndrome relationship. Besides the docuseries “Secrets Of Playboy”, Holly has authored a New York Times Best Seller memoir “The Vegas Diaries: Romance, Rolling The Dice, and The Road To Reinvention” and was a contestant on Dancing With The Stars. Glad to see she’s doing well now, she was always my favorite.
BUT when 13 time Grammy winners formerly known as The Dixie Chicks, found themselves in a similar predicament, they fell victim to possibly the first ever recorded canceling. During a 2003 London show, The Dixie Chicks were quoted saying, “We don’t want this war, this violence, and we’re ashamed that the President of the United States is from Texas.” Stations stopped playing their music, their Billboard Top 10 single fell to 43 in just one week, and my poor mother could no longer unwind on the back porch while listening to “Landslide” on the radio after a long day. The Dixie Chicks were forced into a long hiatus and a name change to “The Chicks”.
These people choose the flavor of the week and their reasoning normally has nothing to do with what they’re being canceled for. They’re obviously not all made up. Again, want to reiterate, Putin definitely a good cancel. But as far as everybody as else goes, do your own homework and draw your own conclusions.
How about a couple of dicksy chicks who made it into the limelight for their criticism of a wrinkly old white man who forced himself into occupying territory that he had no business being in? That’s right, former Playboy Bunny of The Girl’s Next Door hit reality television show, Holly Madison.
Holly since leaving The Girls Next Door has been outspoken about the dark side of being Hugh Hefner’s girlfriend. During her A&E docuseries, Madison detailed the hellish conditions that came with the price of being a resident of the Playboy Mansion. She even went on to describe her love for Hefner as a Stockholm Syndrome relationship. Besides the docuseries “Secrets Of Playboy”, Holly has authored a New York Times Best Seller memoir “The Vegas Diaries: Romance, Rolling The Dice, and The Road To Reinvention” and was a contestant on Dancing With The Stars. Glad to see she’s doing well now, she was always my favorite.
BUT when 13 time Grammy winners formerly known as The Dixie Chicks, found themselves in a similar predicament, they fell victim to possibly the first ever recorded canceling. During a 2003 London show, The Dixie Chicks were quoted saying, “We don’t want this war, this violence, and we’re ashamed that the President of the United States is from Texas.” Stations stopped playing their music, their Billboard Top 10 single fell to 43 in just one week, and my poor mother could no longer unwind on the back porch while listening to “Landslide” on the radio after a long day. The Dixie Chicks were forced into a long hiatus and a name change to “The Chicks”.
These people choose the flavor of the week and their reasoning normally has nothing to do with what they’re being canceled for. They’re obviously not all made up. Again, want to reiterate, Putin definitely a good cancel. But as far as everybody as else goes, do your own homework and draw your own conclusions.
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