Look I’m going to be honest, I started writing this before I knew it was in response to a suicide. I already had it written in my head just from seeing this headline. I mean RIP, but I’m different. I know we as Americans have pretty much agreed to stop roasting the Japanese, but they’re kind of asking for it now, no?
Where’s the line? Because making fun of people on the internet is like 70% of the point of it. Does something drastic have to stem from the cyber bullying for you to be cuffed? Or the second you start busting balls is the Japanese government going to start kicking your door in?
Will there be some online Orwellian police? Think of all the things Japan would have to ban. Call of Duty, comment sections, Reddit, Twitter. Imagine the internet with no roastings? Ugh what’re you gonna do, just share information?
I guess I can’t ever step foot in Japan. It was a toss up too between there and Iceland for my next trip. I eviscerate people on the internet, I’d have to do a life sentence. I mean, look at all these souls I’ve snatched on Twitter.
Like the time Gus Malzahn got fired from Auburn
Or when people made the mistake of buying their dream homes
Or when Skip Bayless started doing Tik Tok dances
Or when I destroyed a random Steelers fan so bad he deleted his Tweet
James Holzhauer’s Jeopardy run
Or Vince Carter’s retirement
See what I mean? Bodied. Can’t do that in Japan and it’s a damn shame. Apparently there’s no honor in it? Well my collective 39 likes say otherwise.
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